ya

i got these from dastrup,

oh snap.

throwin bows

in case you missed it over at barts or sagers page. i had to post this picture. its too funny, bart "throwin bows" as he put it,

with a dude and a penguin on his hat.


omg, thats funny, and omg is even funnier.

heres to the jack mormon militia the acqui berry team.

and right next to the blue and green mona vie kit is the biker edge kit of ryan blaney. i think i remember doing a night lap with him. jake p is right behind him and i see steve wasmund and bunch of other freaks.
that lemans start adds 2 mins to your 1st lap time and is littered with gopher and snake holes that can ruin your whole day


the funniest thing about the deseret news article is thats the local mormon news paper and they printed the "jack mormon militia" in it.

good times.

take the flat route

heres a good story. sounds like my auto biography.

scalpel SI crank comes with ceramic bearings

turbo, jrad, eldevick, what the????

you dont need to give out free stems.

tribute to utah

torkerville?





some people asked me about the "guy on a cross bike" picture below. its 1990 tomac old skool vintage long hair. 1991 world champ on a rigid steel fork rear disc wheel bar con shifters road style bars (obvious) i thought everyone knew. but im so old the young generation needs to have a history lesson.

yes its a mtn bike, before spd, front shocks, before STI, and scissors.
27 pound rigid mtn bike with no shocks. those guys were hard core.


back in 03' i did a couple road races with this guy. he worked me over. i might skip the race saturday and go.

and what the hell is this?
Extreme Beer Pong


Add to My Profile More Videos



swiss miss thinks shes good at ping pong, but i worked her over like this guy.





for forrest.

1994 vail worlds. hank wins on rigid fork and soft ride stem. 3 time world champ 92' 93' 94' yaaaa doper.




























maybe you say, sly, how do you know HES a doper. like it was so long ago. and you think you know everything.

ok, ok. i know almost everything.

this guy named GERT. and mtn jersey tour here
he was a first guy in the tour to get EPO and climb faster than contadoper.
coached bart brentjens (doper) and hank, 3 time world champ.

1996 olympic champ was doped.

you dont win mtn bike races, worlds. 3 times in a row, or 4 times like absalon ala natural. its impossible. or the tour 7 times.

call me a hater, but im right and its true. people who believe these lies probably dont think aliens exist either.

wake up.

i cant walk

cuz gardie kicked my ass.

i thought i was strong but im not.
im going to bed

check out this video

heres my sweet jump. 1st lap is over, bg and mike.

im just sayin

not to beat a dead horse, cuz this weekend was good spectating and riding. but the funny thing in seriously all humor is this:


i know this kid zach shriver, older brother of cracked.

i dont care what race the kid does, but if you have rules then make everyone abide.

funny to watch the race, this EX pro is racing on a sport team and came in 2 mins behind bart on the 1st lap in 5th overall. out of 400 teams.


IM JUST SAYIN.................


there are many more teams like that. but i dont care, never did. just wanted to make a point.

point taken

highlights of the weekend:

watching kenny jones salivate over not being able to race
riding night laps with the tecno blasting in a hawaiian shirt and baggies,
passing shannon at 1130 at night. him looking really blown. (solo hard core props)
bombing the dh while people walk in the sand like the trail of tears.
not getting up in the cold night to "have to" do a lap "for the team"
watching the jack mormon militia hammer the field on 1 speed rigid bikes
having sager catch me on the last 3 miles of the lap and me run him into a sand bog, us doin 35mph passing mad lost fish tailin riders.
hear how bart thinks a 4 man team is "easy"
bart does a 1hr 10 min night lap with a broken chain

saw plesko on the side of the trail fixing his bike

oh ya and ohran dropped me

many more but you will have to go next year and see it first hand

yaaaaaaa free ride

upload this from the desert, behind the rocks. throwin down mad lap times and riding 1 mile long sand pits.

check real time scoring here, i have to go rip some dh

ya free ride

this radio kicks so much ass im using it at wheeler next week.

check out bz, hes my photographer

kenny jones, hes a bad man with a cane.

some people have a problem with my blog

heres the main email and commentary


some anonymous jackass has to put their 2 cents in, if you want to leave a comment then man up and put your name down.

team dicky doesnt seem to get my point.

let me say it again.


there is a hole in the category system, it needs to be fixed.

i dont care if i race granny gear or not, just make the rules for everyone and dont single me out.
make an example of one guy and let the rest slide cuz they are mid pack riders. (like me)


understand

i hope so, its not hard.

big mule packer tolbert stepped in for team kuhl/scott.

maybe someone will complain that hes a 1 speeder and has an advantage or some lame excuse to ban him.

carbon rush

all week the weather has been 70 or 80 and pure sun, nice weather and it may be over for the year.

i borrowed a cannondale rush yesterday and went up red butte, dry creek area. i had never used this style of free ride/race bike before and it was like a couch on wheels.

ok ok , the xc version of a couch. i know there are big travel bikes that weigh more and get more travel but im used to rigid cx bike lately, or the scalpel.

and this was set up at about 23 or 24 lbs so it wasnt super heavy. the lefty max up front with 2.2" oriflammes this bike could do no wrong on the dh. while up on the ridge, sunny perfect weather i spotted on an near by trail tall green kit, atrain was rippin with tbird and dave z. tryin to drop the hammer on the dh.

i talked to the train later and wondered how that ride turned out, dave z was ridin a 1 speed and was climbin fast, tbird was on the specialized big hit and rippin it up. on the dh atrain let it rip and dave z has mad skills.

next time call me tbird and i'll go and show you the secret line. i told you that sweet trail up by brighton. you have to stop hiking up olympus and rip the dh.

lightning rod

seems i wont be racing this weekend.

some people think im a sand bagger and complained.

"semi pros are pros" ya what ever, im out of shape fat and slow, have not been to a big race since june. i guess once labeled then its forever. its like riding a bike on a sidewalk in this town. its illegal and the bike cops will and have taken me to jail for it.

lump them in with the cars.
lump us in with the pros.



i got this in an email.

Have you ever heard of an "Expert" runner?

Many years ago, at the beginning of the sport of mountain bike racing, we set ourselves up for trouble by creating ability classifications (e.g. Sport, Expert, Semi-pro, Pro). The intention was a good one: slice the pie into more pieces so that there would be more delicious racing for everyone. The problem is that there was never any real definition ascribed to these classes and no unified, fair way to track what racers were in what classes. So what we are left with are huge gray areas, lots of opportunities for both intentional or inadvertent sandbagging and lots of dispiriting experiences, grumbling and accusations. NO FUN. the sport of running doesn't have these problems. You can be 1st-place or 5,000th. There's no such thing as a 1st place "Sport" runner, though granted, they do often race in age categories.


Keep in mind that:

Semi-pros are considered to be Pros in Granny Gear events.

5-person Co-ed allows only one expert man per team

5-person Men's and 5-person Women's classes allow only one expert racer per team. Ability classifications do not apply to:

Pro classes (Solo, duo, Co-ed Pro/Am) (you can race in any class above your ability)
Age classifications (Junior, Vet, Masters, Grand Masters) which are open by ability
Just-for-Fun class, which is open to all classifications (gender, ability or age)


i got that info in a longer email that i wont bore you with.

so people dont want me to race, oh well.
i dont agree with semi pros are pros. cuz its not. just lump them in with the pros cuz we cant make another category. we cant please everyone. we cant let the experts complain.

i would race pro if.

i was faster
i had 2 other pros and a girl to do it with
solo class is for crazy guys like bionic

duo is pure hell and no fun

cant do 35 vet cuz im 34 but uscf says im 35, granny gear isnt norba or uscf but they say semi pro is pro. and im 34 not 35.

ok more stupid rules.

cant do 5 man open cuz they dont allow "pros"

so they say race duo, solo or just for fun.

i say no thanks, i'll keep the money and go free ride with the tecno beats all night and lead sager on the sweet line.
no bus driver, no school zone.


i write this not to complain, i dont really care if race it or not. but there is a hole in this system, a flaw with the categories and a big problem here.

i am the exception once again, it has happened many times in other areas and it shows again here.

in the past few years i know guys from slc, semi pros and pros. probably some i dont even know. guys who are good riders, not top tier so they go un-noticed. they race all year. get mid pack finishes and no big deal. they go to moab and race expert. nobody cares. ok fine, i'll try that.

2 days after i put my name on the website all hell breaks loose.

even one guy i was going to race with on this team has a semi pro license and they let him race. kday is a pro, a few years back he did expert, nobody cared, racer and chucky did 5 man open a few years back and they got kicked out.

jake pantone, quin bingham, all these guys i mention are good bikers. they can do as they please and nobody cares.

have some rules and make everyone follow or dont have any at all.

thats all

if they did away with the co-ed pro i would have been at this race every year. instead we get stuck with finding some fast chick, or racing 2 man.

or 1 speed rigid.

those choices are lame and not doing any of them.

they need a new all 4 man pro category like back in the old days.

big prize money

click and enlarge these pay day checks

check out the midwest carpet machine.


these guys got paid in their series finals. you cant see the 1st place guys check but its 1700 doug swanson is like the bart of the midwest, the sager of colorado and the steve tilford of kansas.

i could go on and on but you get the idea.

check out those pay days, that is sweet. nothin like pickin up $185 at the local ICUP.

all those guys up on the podi are like top 20 norba pros. but some gave up norba, i can see why when you travel your local series and pick up cash like that.

who needs norba points. kabush and jhk dont win jack $hit.

i travel to madison each january for one of the best bike swaps in the country. in january, that city has more bike culture than all of utah, nevada and idaho.

the WORS is the biggest state series in the country, the wisconsin bikers, road, mtn or fixies are everywhere and it shows.

chequamegon 40 has 2000 entrants every year for like the last 20 years.

i wonder how to make things around here like that.

im thinking....


that was a sweet post and pics carpet machine

rip it in the full moon with tecno beats

asay looks like gollum

trucker made this ghetto blaster for me. hes like mcgyver. always fixin cars, motos and buying tools on ebay. some times when doing 5 hr road rides he picks up tools in the road. some tools fall out of trucks and trucker finds them. puts them in his jersey pocket and keeps riding for like 3 more hours. the jersey is hanging down past the seat with 12" crescent wrenches.

he hooked up this tecno player for moab this weekend.

im runnin nite laps only and i will be blastin my ipod. this kicks more ass then ali's radio sagging in his jersey pocket.

check out the power source, its a head trip battery.

ya mcgyver it.

table for sale on egay

check out the dude in the mirror

missing in action

seems a few of the local honchs are out doing college national races.

bz and thinner mitchel should be dicin it up locally but are out of town every weekend.

last week they went to laramie, today they are in grand junction racin in the same rain storm we got today.

mitchel is the new flyin tomato

bz needs to not lock his page out, maybe some chicks could check out the goods.

rip it for the u of u.

world cup mud racing in a heber horse pasture

pet peeve #1 for sly,

people complaining of me bunny hopping barriers to the promoter, guys who i dont even race, they are in the 35 plus category, guys who dont even have enough balls to say anything to me, run to the promoter like a little cry baby and complain. like im even fast enough right now for it to make a difference,

what the hell is your problem? you have a problem with me gaining 2 seconds on you?

freakin idiots.

you know who you are, its so lame i cant even say it on this forum.

man up and learn how to do it, or dont act like a little bitch. im racing 35 plus category from now on so i can show this person to HTFU.

this here is ali doing the moon launch

racer looks like a seasoned pro

next time it rains im staying home. let atrain drool.

i told bart it was boring to watch him lap everyone so he sat in and let ali pull for 30 or 40 mins, people were saying, wow, bart has his hands full. i said, no watch him hammer the last few laps. he toyed with him like a red headed step child.. no offense to ali, no one else was there but its funny to watch, instead of get smoked. it makes it more drama for the spectators. instead of ...yawn, oh bart lapped everyone 9 times.

team mona vie pro erin collins flew in from kentucky to dominate the womens A race on a borrowed cross bike, the power and watts unleashed on the field was impressive and she walked away with the gold medal.

nice work TAB.

heres sagers favorite 1 speeder

other cross 1 timers in attendance were wolf man, turbo, team rico and bryson.

with a star studded field like this i opted to call it a day and spray bikes off with a garden hose

heres a summary of my performance,

eat mud mixed with horse crap

watermelon contest

outside the back porch is 5.5 jigawatt power converter so the huffy toss isnt prudent, instead we can drop 20 pound watermelons on to passing cars or some frozen turkeys.

my current moab light set looks like this.

the land of milk and honey

utah has 2 names, beehive and mormon state.

cali has about 10, if they are the "land of fires" then im changing utahs name to gateway to zion.


who came up with these names?


illinois the sucker state?

arkansas bear state?

alabama yellow hammer state?

cali land of fruit and nuts?

ok you get the picture these guys in the think tanks sit around and thats all they come up with i will send them a few submissions of my own.

cali....earthquake state

arizona.....hotter than georgia asphalt state


new york.....gum on the sidewalk state


texas....fattest state in the USA



louisiana.....sinking fast, hurry back!!


florida..... old peoples paradise


washington.....350 days a year of rain state!!!

good news from b-horn

the other night i was at dennys with team old skool guthrie, this is spencer, norm, brando and tyler.

we were pigging out on crappy diner food and apple pies, norm had a chef salad.
i was thinking about i read this thing on b horns page last month about the cell phone car jack left the key inside and locked it type thing a ma jig.

check it here

i wanted to try it so i went outside

norm called me and pushed the button on the key into the phone, i was outside holding my phone near the car door and it opened the locks.

that was like james bond type shit, remember to try it if you lock the keys in your car and someone at home has the spare.


so now b-horn has some new info and i thought it was pretty cool so go check it out


but then the P.I. utah rider, comes through with this bit of info,
who to believe? i dont know i just report the news.

too bad this girl is only 18, i wonder if she broke her wings falling from heaven.

goin down

ali goes big

1st lap digger

like i said the other day, the barriers were too high, check out chippo flailing on the dismount. they were like 36" tall.

but he doesnt give up, next lap clears it, yaa

chillin in the slc high rises

heres to looking south bound off the porch,

not many more days like this left this year. 80 and sunny in the 801.

im sponsoring a huffy toss off the porch, the target is a 30' diameter bullseye in the wallgreens parking lot.

ass kicker

i took this bad boy out for a few hours with mark, too bad i told him we were not going to hammer the climbs but i couldnt help myself. this bike is baddest machine ever made.

they really did some serious upgrades, as if you have not heard already about the world champs and the world cup finals. those pros on this bike have a significant advantage and maybe its unfair to all the other guys on hard tails or other heavy crappy F/S bikes.

ok so really this marvel gets 4" rear, 110mm front, just over 4", its practically still stock, i put on the maxxis 310's and those tires haul so much ass it ridiculous.

im a big fan of lite tires and semi slicks, non UST tires with stans are the way to go for sure, i've used other tires like in the old days twister pros, double fighters, any sworks specialized tire, some ok weight kendas, sizes 1.7 to 1.9" is wide enough for me. so once you got the skill down knowing what you can and cant do with these tires, cornering, hits sharp rocks, the 2 wheel drift breaking point or how hard you can slam a boulder field these tires are good enough for me.

like i said its the flow, the smoothness over the obstacles and rocks. dont bash rocks dent rims and break stuff. haul ass but do it like a butter fly.

watch a fast moving river and be the water over the rocks.

no effort. just flow.

ok now im off track but anyway if you think your bike is the best you should try this and you will change your mind quickly.

29ers are so off the back its just crazy and so obvious to me how slow those bikes are, so all that ride or race them. i have to say thank you for the handicap.

if you would smarten up and try new technology you might take 10 mins off your xc race time.

but until then i will be slower, less fit and fatter, staying ahead of you in the process with less effort and struggle.

with a few modifications its easy to see how this can be 19 pounds xc race bomb proof. this new rear suspension design is stiffer and lighter, obviously the weight is a big deal. the bb/ crankset is redesigned, lighter and stiffer. very noticeable on the climbs locked out front and rear, with these tires and the overall weight its like climbing on a road bike. smooth, stiff and maximum power transfer with the lowest effort possible.

i could go on for hours about how superior this bike is but the only thing is to find one and go test it out yourself.
i will be ripping it down in moab next weekend on the night laps so listen for the tecno beat and then pull over cuz im comin in hot.

maybe its the ceramic bearings. damn im smooth.

so there was another story going on today but i will tell it tomorrow.

the subject goes like this, mark neilson is faster than in may, and this 17 year old kid who has never raced comes flying by me on a climb and keeps up the whole time on a big ass free ride bike.

i told him to come to wheeler and learn some racing tactics, maybe hes the next tomes in the making?

check out my new bike

i picked up this new scalpel today it kicks ass. i could have used it on the dry creek, me and mark got blown off the hill by 150mph winds. im not lying.

carbon scalpel with dt carbon rear shock.

this bike kicks ass over any other so dont even try.

this comes stock with crossmark UST and crossmax as you can see. new stans wheelset or some reynolds tubulars and or maxxis 310's or tufo tubulars, some cork grips and an slr its 19 lbs.

some tech geeks at the world cups last month had an 18 pounder but im not using carbon chain rings.

ok i can switch a few parts and make it sick lite. if you guys know how i roll i dont put crap on the ride, you got to finish to rip it so all parts are xc bomb proof.

that is if you know how to use finesse and not bash trees and rocks like chris sherwin.

its the smooth flow like style that gets it done, it takes years to perfect and im still workin on it.

flow is a state not a place