Wednesday, August 22, 2007

quote of the day


stupidbike commenting on why NOT to race lotoja


"LOTOJA, besides the fact that it is full, with a long wait list, I believe a 200 mile road race would be very similar to hitting my nether regions repeatedly with a mallet. "

i couldnt agree more and that is the funniest shit i've seen all day.

imagine bob slamming his crotch with a mallet, holy hell.



that race is gay, im not sure which is more gay,

the race or the guys driving around town with the "LOTOJA" sticker on the back window of their SUV.



i did it once, in baggy shorts.

it was most boring day of my life.

disclaimer.

if you rode, ride or like this race dont think i am demeaning you as a cyclist. i hate the race not you so get over it.

Monday, August 20, 2007

the rock spine at night is hard

the thing about this sunset is that its the same pic of the one right above in the header. im on the rock spine looking west of course, just 8 hrs later in the day.






me and rico went up to lake deso tonight, i tried the ride the spine in the dark and it wasnt happenin, i was like a 2 yr old on ice skates.

















wow that was demoralizing. oh well we got in a good loop and ripped the dh. bears and lions were chasing us im sure.








we went up to dog lake then deso then down the main gw trail. about a mile from the end we found these guys, it was 10pm and they had some flats and got caught in the pitch dark forest.

so we let them follow us down with the nite riders. since their car was at the bottom of the canyon they could use a ride in the van, who wants to ride 9 miles on pavement in the pitch black nite
then i found out they are trail guides for this place utah bike n climb.

check it out its pretty cool, they guide out of towners around the wasatch, so i said they owe me a job next year.















we'll see, i got some pics of the guys and rico, the moon and the sunset.








ya

rico says shred millcreek at 8

im goin up to pc, head up from park west, meet them at the ridge some where and ride home.

just heard santurbane got smashed by a car and broke some bones, dont know much more than that.
hope his head is in 1 peice.

headin up parleys, when i meet up with team porc i will document the sighting.



chippo thinks hes fast but hes avoiding sly, probably doesnt want to get his ass whooped.

stupidest show on tv

criss angel mind freak is the lamest show ever made.

who is this loser

hes either an alien or a fraud

this video is way better than his stupid show
he should be cancelled, he sucks

Sunday, August 19, 2007

homeless against the wall



these drunk indians live behind my house, i walk through this field every day and they didnt live there a few months ago.



but they sleep and drink beer against this wall behind the burger king on 600 east. the vacant lot used to be full of weeds and no garbage but these ass clowns just throw their garbage around and leave their card board bedding and nasty sleeping bags there all day. when you walk by, about 50 feet away you can smell the stank.


its not right, they sit across the street at hollywood video and beg for money all day, i see the people give them stuff, then they go to fred meyer and buy a case of pbr and throw the cans in the field.

im goin to start crackin skulls.

















i guess i need some new material, im down to taken pictures of garbage in the big city.
i got nothing against the homeless, but pick the trash up. its my back yard.
sleep against the wall if you want.
its free, ya good times.

Saturday, August 18, 2007

a lot a stuff but im realllllllllly tired

i got about 20 mins sleep last night,

not cuz im out at the club pickin up hot chicks, but cuz i lay in bed staring at the ceiling. wondering what if and why.

some times i look at the wall and wonder.
something crazy happened last night but im not going into it. it started off at 9pm with a really short ride. then came home tired and thought i was going to bed early. i planned to get up at 6am and go a few blocks over to see the old key bank tower blow up.


you may ask, well i was in the down town area and i still see the key bank tower. well if you are not in the know, here you go.

50 south main is the cross roads mall. its all blown up now. that whole block is gone. they ripped it down over the last few months. they will be tearing down the zcmi center at 50 main and across the street at 40 main. they moved the name of the key bank tower to 36 state which used to be the beneficial life tower.
over the next 4 years they are rebuilding these 2 main city blocks with 10,000 or so hotel rooms and condos.
its supposed to be some big shit goin on.


they better do something down there, its like a ghost town. even before they wrecked anything.
anyway long story.
up all night, then i went over to triad and saw that big bang.
i got a few pics but they are lame since im 4 blocks away. the security grid was tighter than a......well i will leave it up to you.
then i went down to 9400 south at little cottonwood canyon. it was windy, cloudy and right at the start it was a down pour, lightning all around and up the canyon. so james cancelled the mtn hc up at gad2.

playin tecno at 8am gets the blood going. even if ali g is at home makin flap jacks.


the pro 1-2 field was weak.

like 10 guys showed up, im not saying they are slow its just there wasnt that many of them.
i was up at tanner and normy had a 10 sec lead over mitchel, santa, tyson, alex g the summer time dominator
and couple other guys.
i think mitchel won and normy got 2nd, i dont know the results i wasnt at the finish line.
then bryson pulled up on his moto, hes blown like me so we watched as the rain stopped and the temp guage said 55 degrees at 7500 feet.
if you dont know mitchel peterson hes the tall thinner brother of chris peterson. these 2 are about 6' 2" and 130 lbs each.

they were born on the mtn bikes a few years back, and now mitchel races pro at the norbas.

the kid can climb, start fast and hammer but lacks a good dh and at every race ive been to with him this year goes from 1st to about 8th on the 1st dh and then cant make up any time on the remaining laps.

i wish i had his power to weight ratio.
keep practicin mitch, you will get it.

hes only like 20 or something crazy like that.
yaaa
i got a few pics but im tired so maybe post that sheeat laterrr.

i saw this on discovery channel or something last year, then i stole these pics from matt ant. aka matt love. watched them build it and this ski run has a black diamond on it.
dubai is in the middle east, the rich oil country. this prince guy has so much money he wanted to build a ski run in the middle of the freakin desert.

its probably the same guy who wanted to build his own palm island in the ocean.
i wonder how it is dreaming up ways to spend 100 billion dollars on crazy shit just cuz you can.

Friday, August 17, 2007

this is what happens when you get old

atrain gets old 8-18-07

last night i was up on the trail, 930 pm trail shred.


lots of tarantulas and birds. these owl like birds sit on the trail and watch you ride up to them like 1 foot away then fly up in my face and take off.


pisses me off.



next time im bringin a camera.

i saw a bunch of fish on trail,
drunk fish, the cutthroat team was out for a drunk night ride. i think wasmund was towing the cooler. ok maybe not, that was last time.
they race around in circles and drink beer every lap. last month jason from lmi got lost on the brink trail and ended up in farmington peak at 5am. ok jdog isnt in the video, but hes on the phone so that counts.

9 hours of hiking the ridge north bound.
thats a long night.
oh yaa

tomorrow is the the key bank demolition., they say dont go down there, the dust is toxic and i dont need that.

but my plan is to get real close to the barricade at 630am, on my bike then when the dust cloud comes im goin to rip it south bound and out run the fumes.

then im haulin ass in the van to little cottonwood, beat the 8am race start and play tecno up at tanners flat.

then im gettin the 2x9 out on the scalpel and ridin up to hidden peak before alex g does the bike switch.

ya rip it
if you go over dr x's home page you can read about the portland cross series.
its a circus show, they have a category for choppers i guess.

Thursday, August 16, 2007

i wasnt going to write anything

i have not felt like putting anything up on the www for a few days, i did a few night rides.

but then


then i saw this and changed my mind. i feel the same way as tbird wrote his latest entry, i know how he feels and know where hes coming from.
i dont like being one of those guys either.
you know the guy at the race where people want to beat, its makes their day. like i rub it in ones face when time and time again i crush them. everyone has up and down days on the racing circuit.

mostly for me its below par, once in a while i impress myself. but overall its worse than normal.


im not comparing myself to tbird. i know where hes coming from. us old jaded racers. im no pro, but i see what hes saying,
people always asking why you didnt win
more people asking what went wrong when you didnt win
same people not saying anything to you when you crush them for years then one day you suck and they get you by a minute and its their best day of life.
then those people years later telling the story, "remember that day i kicked your ass by a minute"

ya i hate it,
first it makes me wonder why im the guy to beat, why im on the radar, im not the king.
sometimes i think i am, but i won one race this year,

5 months ago.
i dont like lining up for training races. in july, august or sept. knowing its going to suck, how the good days of spring are long gone, easy ass kickings are over for awhile, knowing its for the greater good of 6 weeks down the road the pain will turn into ass whoopins with no effort.
lining up knowing its a slaugterfest and in an hour its over but its going to suck so bad,

trying to get used to the insane fast starts, the first 10 minutes of pin to win it style that you need not to bogged down by traffic and 1 track.

they hurt in the beginning but after a few weeks its like a sunday stroll. pinning it at hr 195 for 10 mins to get rid of unwanted baggage.


but i have heard many stories and people say about me.
say it, ive heard it, bring it, talk the trash, i deserve it. i instigate it so deal with it.

like lately, im not fast, i didnt train or race much for the past 2 months. so last week i decide its time to get in some 1 hr hard races.
i went to solitude and got my ass kicked

i went to soldier hollow yesterday and got worked over again, ya im feeling better but chris holley josh and tyson kicked my ass on the climbs.

even brian, barts little brother was giving it a go and laying it all out. he was right in there as well.

kenny jones on a 1 speed not far off the pace, brandon firth. it was a pretty close race after an hour.

so i dont win but it makes some guys day to beat me at a weekly race.

its goes something like this,
sly
so you blew up again, didnt win, gave the race away. etc.

rider with no name
ya but i didnt care cuz i was ahead of you.


im not sure to be proud of that or not. if some guys race performance is good judged on whether they beat me and not win the race or not.


all i know is if im so out of race shape these guys who can kick me while im down better get their licks in.

theres a cross race next week, then i'll probably hit up some rmr and dmv. just so the roadies can get a dose of cyclo cross pain i'll be dishin out in october.

if you see me take off at the start dont chase me cuz i'll probably blow up.

better practice your bunny hops, im up to 26"

Monday, August 13, 2007

while bart has the gh flowing free


i was out on the trail, i saw a porc.
but it wasnt a red and blue one.

it was the real deal. he was hauling ass ripping the 1 track. waddling was more like it.

so if you dont know about gh heres a lesson. its growth hormone, it makes you recover and grows your muscles back from training.

it only happens during sleep so get your rest or end up over trained and tired.

so im out shredding 1 track, its 11pm and bart goes to sleep at 930. i guess thats why i get up at 10.

yaa

Sunday, August 12, 2007

abe lincoln


this is eric, aka mystery. the pick up artist.
notice the kiss tat on his neck.

sweet.

i think abe lincoln wore that hat to a rave once.
thats the best one i've heard all day.



















I'm a white boy, but my neck is red

I put Miracle Whip up on my Wonder Bread

My face is pale,

Nah,

I've been in jail
Me and gypsy spend every winter at Vail
How many bitches

have I slapped?
Zero,

uhhhnn,

And Martha Stewart
happens to be my hero

I grew up on a farm,
and I was born with no rhythm

Dr. Phil's my uncle,

and I like to hang with him

I can't dance,
I wear khaki pants
My middle name's Lance,

my grandma's from France

So maybe I'm wack 'cause my skin ain't black
But you can't talk smack '
Cause whitey just struck back

Whoo!

That's what I'm talking about!

breakin the law

they have had that gay law of no riding in millcreek on odd numbered days since about 1994. i remember back then i thought it was lame. i still do, but we used to poach it and the hikers would bring sticks and try to hit us as we ripped by doing 30, skidding and spraying them with gravel.
one time some guys from new zealand were in town and we rode up millcreek dog lake and there was a ranger lady at the lake we all blitzed her and hauled ass down mill d. she tried to ride after us but obviously that was a lost cause.

so she got on the radio and called for back up. once we got down to the road in big c, about 5 mins later, since we were hauling so much ass, we had to hide in the bushes.

the five 0 sped by with sirens blaring and came skidding into the parking area trying to cut us off as if we were robbing a bank. good thing we made it down and out before he got there. i could have been locked up for poaching wasatch 1 track.
thats un called for.

but when you blaze lights at night in millcreek i wonder if the laws still apply, since nobody is up there. tomorrow its the 13th and by 11pm i plan on ripping the forbidden fruit.

we'll see, but i dont think anyone will be there to complain.

unless they read this first.
i pack heat like june and july

next saturday 8-18-07 at 630am im throwin a party down town for the key bank tower demolition. its goin to be sweet. blowin shit up at the crack of ass.
yaa

the party is at the mormon temple at the pond about 50 north main.

be there for a hoe down.

Saturday, August 11, 2007

friday fun day

this is what happens when you have goals.


ok usually i say mondays are better than fridays but today i went to a movie then to lagoon with some friends. mostly the kind that dont ride bikes. well some did but thats another story.

and the movie mike moores sicko, thats another story. that guy should be president. he tells it and people hate him for it.
hes the man and if you dont believe any of his movies you need to wake up.

so i never go to lagoon cuz i hate lines, hate waiting for anything, hate traffic, hate slow stupid people, hate walking, hate payin $40 to get in and wait in lines, again, yes,
and then pay $5 to play stupid games that you never win the stuffed animal.

ya but i went any way last minute only for 4 hrs from 5 to 9pm. and i remember why i hate that place.

ok some of the rides are cool, if they offered a no wait in line pass for $300 i would buy it. just walk up to the front and flash the golden ticket and get on the ride that would kick ass.

30 min line waiting for a minute ride is really lame.

glad i only was there for 4 hrs and did 3 rides.

then i lost 100 bucks trying to win some stuffed animals for these kids i was with. that was a scam and saw it coming

the kid working the game tells me this

"you know i have never seen anyone knock these cups over"
"nobody ever wins this game, you have better luck over there"
ya scams, that game over there, the wack a mole game the moles dont even come out of the hole high enough to wack them.
nobody has more cat like skills than sly and these 10 year old kids whooped my ass.
scams. im stickin to the ps3.

ok thanks take my $10 bucks and you might as well kick me in the balls.
i think i would rather lose my 100 bucks at the black jack table in vegas. at least that game involves a bit of luck and some skill.
this is just plain high way robbery.

other than that the lagoon thing still reminds me of 1980, same dumb rides and hordes of fat people smoking with 10 kids running around dumping coke on each other. stuffing their faces with fries and corn dogs

sweet good times

but i do like fooling the guessing guy who thinks he can guess my age. everyone always misses my age, hell in vegas i cant walk in a casino for 2 mins before some pit boss cards me.
they say its something to greatful for, but it pisses me off.

i told the guy to guess high cuz i just clicked off another year. he studied my face harder than the rest and still was too low.

30, ya thanks but you lose too again mr. pro age guesser.

now give me my 10 cent stuffed animal i just paid you $3 for.

now its happy bday to adam lisonbee, same day bday. hope you made it another season and see you next summer.

Friday, August 10, 2007

its 12 am where are you



i was out on the trail rippin it up


yaa

Thursday, August 09, 2007

i want a new cross bike for my bday



just so you guys dont get me any lame presents, like clothes or any cheap bikes.


get this one

full speed big ring trail shred


the best thing about nite riding is the wolves.

its a fox hunt.

up on the dry creek at 10pm the animals come out.

the fox is on the hunt for wolves and bears.


this new light is brighter than your car.

i rip it faster than the day, nobody on the trail so there is no crashing into hikers

full on dh speed mach 10. when you are in the big city and look north to the foot hills you can see my lights blaring in the darkness.

ya thats me rippin the trail.

Wednesday, August 08, 2007

listen to dubya


last night

solitude races ended last night, i didnt time that very good. i only did one race in july. oh well.
i won some shoes.
they gave out $2500 in cash last night for a 6 series prize. you all didnt go and missed out on the cash just like me, and the cool weather, at 630 its 70 degrees and when you get done at 730 its 55 degrees. summer is over, get the snow shoes out.

pros men and women both got $375 each,
2nd was 225 each for men and women
150 for 3rd.
even sport class won 100 bucks.
plus there is free full throttle all you can drink.
just for team rico.



i like racing the frozen pig on feb 3rd. that was 15 degreeeeees.
alex and bz only put 5 mins on me, in one hour thats what you call an ass whoopin, but im sure i was the fastest on the dh. i was thinking about doing the snowbird ultra but i decided thats too much pain.

snowbird hillclimb road and mtn all at once
when you finish the road part at gad2 then youre only 1/2 way done, you got another 3,000 vertical up to hidden peak.
on one bike, a cross bike with a granny gear. have you ever ridden up to hidden peak, its a bitch, no big ring needed on that climb.

the best part on the flyer it says "what a great way to spend a saturday morning"
oh hell no.

i can think of 10 things that are better to do at 8am then ride my ass to hidden peak.
6000 vertical gain from sandy. no thanks, i'd rather sleep till 10, get a massage and eat twinkies.

maybe i'll go watch.
its way easier.

i added some new music, lotsa good mixes and the last one on the player is for sager.
yaaaaaaa
if you're not ridin you're skatin
kick, push, kick, push.......coast

Tuesday, August 07, 2007

nine five plus four pennies add that shit up

replace with this



Sunday, August 05, 2007

movies sleepin and tv

thats all i did today, there were 3 loonies riding for 10 hrs yesterday. that course sounds like hell.

you guys are crazy. too bad dave aka bionic couldnt do it.
my stat counter turned over at 30,000 hits today, i dont think its too bad since i only installed it april 1st. just over 4 months ago.

maybe tomorrow i will try to ride for 10 hrs, just so i dont feel bad.

Saturday, August 04, 2007

wolverine ridge pizza party & picture blog

ya so i ordered a new camera on egay so the pics will be better.


here are some random guys riding dirt roads.

yaa
rip it


































































ya ride the wolverine and pig out on pizza

Friday, August 03, 2007

friday means tomorrow is saturday

i rode a trail then went to a movie

see ya at the races
tecno in the forest
yaa

Thursday, August 02, 2007

changes to paypal donations

thanks to flahute for being the biggest donation of the year.
out doing sager by 149% , master by 66% and lynda by 33%
Dear cris fox,


Steven Sheffield just sent you money with PayPal.

Steven Sheffield is a Verified buyer.





Payment Details


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Transaction ID: 4BD7847138350244R

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Note: Gotta be the biggest donor!


paypal fees are out of hand, i have to tell you.
out of the money donated they took 33 cents out of a dollar, 35 cents out of a dollar 50, and 33 cents out of masters 58 cent donation.

this is highway robbery,

to reduce the costs i am asking for a minimum donation of 10 dollars USA funds only please.

thank you

sly

unintentional steroid use






Dear cris fox,
jason sager just sent you money with PayPal.

jason sager is a Verified buyer.
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rewards for all that you've done


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I just gave you half of what's in my paypal account. that's more than tithing!

Wednesday, August 01, 2007

fast bitch




i saw a camaro today with "fast bitch" at the top of the back window, full length 4' foot long. it was pretty sweet.

i've been riding up in the foot hills at 8pm, i dont bring lights yet but i will be soon. i get home at 930 and rippin the dh at full speed in the dark builds confidence and trains your mind to ride by braille. you dont need your eyes to rip the dh, its all feel and anticipation.

try ripping it with a blind fold, it teaches you to feel the trail and trust your instincts.

adam L said his bday is next friday, same as me. i got a few years on the young buck so maybe we could throw a hoe down and we could be worshipped for the day.
yaa

sager has a picture of my ass, wonder how he got that, i would be suspect, but he has a hot girl friend.

and a new kick ass tecno remix at the bottom of the player. makes me want to bunny hop some 24" barriers.




better get the fore arm pump goin, 8 weeks to domination.




yaa




i saw this guy over at fred meyer, hes really normal. really.

master sent me a donation.
hey thanks.
Dear cris fox,
jeff bates just sent you money with PayPal.
jeff bates is a Verified buyer.

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Master